The past week, I’ve seen so many pictures of diplomas, caps
(rhinestones included), and gowns. It wasn’t until then that it hit me that it
has been a year since I graduated, and safe to say its been one of the fastest,
not to mention, surprising years of my life.
Lets hit a few highlights.
- I got my degree
- I learned what it was like to have an emotional breakdown. I guess I was long overdue after 23 years.
- I started my first “real” job
- I moved to a new city alone
Right before graduation last year, I started praying that
God would grow me in more ways than He ever had in the upcoming year. God
definitely answered my prayer, but not the way I expected Him to. Funny how He
works like that right?
In my mind, I was asking God to teach me a lot from his Word,
let me hear some good messages at church, and find a good Bible study. Sure,
all of those things happened this year, but
those barely encompassed His answer. Don’t ask God for something and expect a
human answer. Ephesians 3:20 says it perfectly “ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or
imagine...”
God’s answer looked more like this. I moved me to Tulsa and
was leaving my favorite people in the world in another city. God popped my
bubble. Don’t get me wrong, staying where I had been for the past 4 years
wouldn’t have been a bad thing. I had a great church, amazing friendships, and
most of all security. God knew better than me though. He knew he couldn’t grow
me in the way I had asked with my eyes fixed on the things I already had going
for me.
Going through college, I grew in so many ways. Friendships,
mentors, professors, pastors, and countless others who invested in my life
shaped and formed me over the span of four years. I learned what it meant to
have selfless friendships, learned to be independent, and learned what it
looked like to have a deep personal daily relationship with Christ. Diploma in
hand, and four years under my belt, I was sure God has shaped and molded me
into the woman he wanted me to be.
That just shows I was still putting God in a box. Moving to
Tulsa, I’ve learned things about myself I would have never seen without
stepping out my bubble. I’ve seen so many areas I was placing security in the
blessings God had given me instead of in the one who had provided them for me. Temporary security can be found in a familiar face, but true security and joy, crossing all city, state, and country lines, can only come from the Lord.
The biggest lesson I have learned, is that God isn’t through with me yet, and
he never will be. There is always room to grow, learn and change and I am so
thankful God continually places people me in my life who are wiser than me to
help me find my way when I get off track.
Despite all the change that has happened in the past year,
one thing hasn’t changed. God is the one thing that has remained a constant in
my life. He has proven himself faithful, answered so many of my specific
prayers, and shown me His love in the most unusual places.
What a comfort to serve a constant, loving God. If life can change so much in 1 year, I
can’t even begin to fathom all that will come at me in the future. The thing is
though, that I don’t have to, because He holds the future, not me. He has a
plan, and knows me better than I know myself.
God may give us 525,600 minutes in a year, but he doesn’t
ask us to have every one of those figured out ahead of time. He asks us to live
for him moment by moment, and day by day and trust that He will take care of
all the unknowns. With His help, that’s something I can handle.
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